Today’s dating scene is quite chaotic and complex and sometimes it can feel as if real love doesn’t even exist. Many men play mind games and manipulate women into thinking they’re serious when they’re actually not. Depending on your personality, there are a lot of ways to slow things down in a relationship such as; being honest about your feelings and letting your partner know about your concerns. Also avoiding huge commitments until you feel comfortable, and maintaining a minimal flow of communication between the two of you. Taking things slowly in a relationship means different things to different people.
He Doesn’t Mention Being Casual Or Not Being Ready For A Relationship
Many of us use online dating or have our go-to dating apps when we want to meet someone, so we’re already incorporating the use of texting into relationships, even at the earliest stages. When we’ve found someone interesting and we’re on the verge of « graduating » from talking exclusively in our favourite app to acquiring their number, it’s a new ball game. He may have had experiences with rebound relationships that happened before he was ready. When he takes his time, he is protecting your feelings by being sure he is not stepping into something committed before he is ready. The pace of your relationship matters, and although you may crave a whirlwind romance that could fit into a 2 hour rom-com, the truth is that there is no rush when it comes to love.
But sometimes the reason why you’re not ready to get into another relationship right away isn’t that you’re hurt or hung up on your ex but rather you’re just exhausted from the last relationship. There are countless reasons why he would suggest that but none of them should prompt you to question his commitment. Sure, most men have commitment issues but you shouldn’t immediately think that he’s not ready for a relationship. One of the more obvious reasons why a guy may suggest slowing things down a bit is to take his time with the relationship.
How to Decide if He’s Right for You
Relationships get severe after sexual intercourse, so he might discourage a romantic association from happening. Some of the possible things that could hinder constant involvement include a demanding job or life challenges that need absolute attention. If they can’t call or text you as much as their significant other would love while dating, they would prefer to grow the association steadily until they have time for the relationship. He would preferably focus on intimacy and building a strong commitment to each other before focusing on other areas. Some guys might even decide to hold off on sex to get to know their significant other more.
If your man is divorced, there is the additional challenge of an ex and possibly children. I know you might be excited and may well see a future with this person (POTENTIALLY!) but to avoid putting any expectations or pressure on the relationship. Don’t fall into ‘long term couple’ territory where everything becomes cosy yet predictable. Keep the other person on their toes, and make sure you’re kept on your toes too.
Daisy even admitted to me that her volatility is one of the reasons she doesn’t know if she’s ready for a new relationship yet. “In today’s world, you’ve got to know how to be the man that women really want to be with. And what I really mean by this is that when you’re trying to decide whether he’s ready for new love, notice how he talks about his ex. There is no need to also bring the subject « where is this going » or « are we exclusive? » if he has said it once that he wasn’t ready for relationship. The less you are attached and act eager, the safer he feels and the more he wants to come closer and spend more time with you. Let him untie the knots -the fear and concern of commitment- little by little by himself.
If you find yourself tossing and turning over your new guy’s desire to keep your relationship on the slow side, often you needn’t worry. When asked about moving slowly within a relationship, many men on Reddit have reported positive reasons behind their reluctance to move fast. In any fiery new romance, you’re the one holding the match, and it’s ultimately your choice whether you fan the flames or put it out entirely. If you decide that you need to slow your relationship down, then go ahead and slow it down. The right person will be happy to get to know you at any pace you need. Consider this a good litmus test to determine if your potential partner can respect your needs.
If a guy’s new partner makes him recollect previous events from his past, especially with an ex, he would prefer to slow down things for a while. Even if he is head over heels with you, he wants his new relationship to be different and unique, which is why he wants to focus on the essential parts of the association. He has perceived that this action will make the relationship blossom instaflirt bad gateway naturally and make his girl comfortable with him. Therefore, he suggests taking things slow to help sustain harmony in the association. This suggestion doesn’t diminish his commitment to the association but reveals how willing he is to make things work. Throwing yourselves into a one-on-one situation too quickly before both of you are ready for it can feel extremely stressful.
He is living the life that he wants, and he is not seeking a relationship out of desperation and need. But in serial monogamy, there’s none of that awareness and conscious action. To outside observers, his serial monogamy might appear as a committed relationship, after all he’s dating exclusively.
You can’t genuinely assess how you feel, or if someone is or isn’t right for you – which means you’re far more likely to rush into something that will only inevitably end in heartache. To cut to the chase, relationships that start fast don’t always have staying power. These whirlwind romances are actually more likely to fall apart because they’re built on lust, illusion and fantasy. It’s all too intense, and it often becomes too much for both parties.
This story can help you turn things around with the guy who is being wishy-washy about being in a relationship with you – and I’d encourage you to make that happen. Keeping in mind that we aren’t the center of our new beau’s world may seem obvious, but it’s easy to get lost in our fantasies when we’re getting to know them! We know we want to be at the forefront of their minds, so the best way to make sure it happens is to allow the conversation to flow, and enjoy the ride.
So, enjoy your time together and leave the introductions for another time. The attraction for each other is apparent, and the desire to be a part of each other’s lives is strong. Before you know it, you may be stalking their social media pages, incessantly calling/texting them, giving them late-night calls, and constantly thinking about them. Getting hot and heavy early on can cloud your vision and prevent you from thinking objectively.
